Tuesday 26 May 2009

Changes

Do you like them? I don't. I have to force myself to move on (hence the title of my blog). I have to motivate myself constantly. I like my comfort zone and familiar stuff. Every change is a well planned and given much thinking. You wouldn't say that artistic person would be like that. But I think that art is my comfort zone too, my way of doing something new. You wouldn't think that changing the look of my blog would be stressing for me. But it is. I liked the old one (and I was used to it) but the time for change was here. So how do you like it (or do you like it at all)? Was the old one better? They say that we mustn't let ourselves grow accustomed to our surroundings or get to fond of stuff (they confine our spirit). But it's hard for me. As every normal grown up person, I blame my childhood for that. I grew up during the war and we had so little. So every toy, every piece of rubbish had its meaning and purpose. Today, I find it hard to separate myself from the old stuff. Like jeans I wore when I had 50kg and I am certain I won't be able to wear ever again. But they stay at the bottom of my drawer just in case :) I don't want for this blog to turn into my nagging place. So tell me, are you adventurous? Do you like or dread changes?
The thing I noticed is that every change is easier (for me) if I have someone else to do it with me. Like, when I had to go to college out of my hometown - it was a huge relief that I had my sister there already in college. Or when I go on vacation (!) I don't want to do it alone but prefer to go with someone else (even if that someone else is my grandma :))
They also say that you have to face your fears to conquer them. So my BIG adventure will start in October! I've decided to go back to college and get myself another diploma - MBA. You can't have enough knowledge at this times of crises (here I go again creating myself a safe net for the future). Although I love art, it is becoming harder every day to pay bills with it. I already work as a part time project manager so why not have a good background and a greater knowledge and understanding of the job I already work. And I got my firm to pay it for me (hopefully, I haven't signed my contract yet). The challenge for me isn't actually college itself, no, it’s the fact that the college is in another town and I will have to drive myself for a 1, 5 hour -five to ten days a month for two years! Huh, what a challenge? Well, it doesn’t seem like that, but please take into account that I will have to work from 7 a.m. to 3.pm. then jump into the car and drive for a 1, 5 hour listen to the classes until 10 p.m. and then drive alone home and in the morning repeat routine.
Another thing with fears - they don't sound so grave when you write them down!

And here is to my 15 years of English class - only now I've realised the mistake in my blog title? It's stuff not staff - maybe I should concern myself with my learning and observation issues not with my driving challenges, hmh...

It’s been a long blog – thanks to anyone who got to this part!

4 comments:

  1. Host ~ You are inspiring! I admire that fact that you are going back to college. ((((clapping))))
    I do love the blog, I did love the old one.
    We do care what other people think, but your blog is your place to come to... and If you love to come home to it, then that is what matters... it doesn't matter what color the wallpaper is, as long as you know it represents you.

    *The sad fact is that I realize, I do love adventure, but only when I am the one in charge. I am nervous, even a little fearsome if someone is in charge of the adventure I am to be set on. I love change, but the same rule applies. When I am the one in charge of the change... not when someone else is making change for me. I guess we all have our little quircks. Great post to make someone think!

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  2. Thanks! Both for the clapping and for sharing your little quircks - as you call them :)

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  3. Well you deserve more than claps for going back to school!!! That is something for sure to be proud of!!!

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  4. Hey honey.. head over to my place to pick up some awards that I have for you!! Hope you had a great weekend!

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